The Harsh Reality of NOT Loving Your Body

Today I want to share with you the reality of not loving your body…

The truth is that every time you spend energy focusing on the appearance of your body - how it should look, how it could be better, what you don’t like, how others are perceiving it, how it compares to media images or your friends…

You are diminishing your purpose, pleasure, and power.

From a young age, we have been systematically taught to  control our body as women. We’ve been conditioned to be pre-occupied with the shape of our body - how it should look and move.

We’ve been taught to spend enormous amounts of time and energy making sure our body appears a certain way for the rest of the world. But also - we’ve been taught to make sure our body behaves in a certain way too.

We are pre-occupied with ensuring our body is “appealing” rather than spending that valuable energy devoted to our power, pleasure, and purpose.

Even when you feel “happy” with the shape of your body - how much energy do you spend making sure it remains that way?

(Note - this is not a condemnation of self-care and self-love… I am ALL FOR taking care of yourself and your body in a loving, supportive way!)

But when we are in the habit of obsessing about the shape and behaviour of our body, it’s hard to let this habit go even when we’ve achieved our “ideal body.”

Your ability to love your body and to fully own the space you take up in this world - is directly related to your pleasure and personal power!

When you let go of your pre-occupation with making sure your body is “just right,” you free up an enormous amount of energy to make a difference in the world. 

While you are busy stressing and dwelling about your body,  you are sacrificing your right to enjoy your body - the pleasure it can provide you, and your body’s ability to communicate and fully express your purpose and intentions.

At a speaking retreat I recently attended in Las Vegas, I was reminded of how we communicate with our entire body. 

So when we are focused on controlling, shaping, and minimizing our body, we are truly minimizing our voice.

Knowing this, how then do we free ourselves from body-obsession and controlling thoughts or behaviours?


Unleash and experience your profound pleasure potential.

Intentionally devote time and energy to exploring and feeling pleasure in your body.

My favourite way to do this is self-pleasure.

I’m not talking about whipping out the vibrator or quickly rubbing one out. While that’s all good, I’m talking about going deep…

I want you to seduce yourself and give yourself profound permission

Dance, touch, move, feel, and express in a way that you deeply crave. 

It might be scary, awkward, embarrassing, or weird. 

Or maybe you feel as though you have no idea what you actually want.

This is common, and I totally get it.

No one teaches us how to pleasure ourselves - or even that self-pleasure is okay AND good for us!

Here are 3 ways you can get started with self-pleasure in a way that will profoundly heal your relationship with your body and vagina:

1. Self-Massage: Massage your vulva and the inside of your vagina with your hands or a wand (i.e. non-vibrating object). Remove the goal of orgasm altogether, and simply massage yourself with the intention to explore, while bringing your awareness to all of the subtle sensations you feel, and breathing deep and slow into your belly.

2. Yoni Egg Practice: This ancient practice re-sensitizes your vagina and your entire body to pleasure and the flow of sexual energy. Learn more about the benefits & how to do this practice here.

3. Erotic Dance: Put on some music that turns you on (either in a relaxing or energizing, arousing way). Close your eyes, and slowly give yourself permission to move and touch your body in a way that just feels REALLY good. You’ll be surprised at how deep you can go and how much pleasure you’ll discover if you really surrender to this practice.

I guarantee that by committing to just one of these things this week, you will experience a shift in your body that will allow you to feel more free, confident, womanly, and powerful!

Courtney xx

P.S. Ready for more pleasure, power, and purpose? Join me in Viva La Vagina - the online course I’ve created for you to deeply connect to your body and vagina. Learn more here.

And if you’re looking to purchase a beautiful, high-quality pleasure wand or yoni egg, click here.

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