What most of us think when we hear the world celibacy is this - no sex, no fun.

Some of us have also had our run with purity culture, which tells us we must snuff the flame of our desire completely.

But what if there was another way?

What if instead, we leaned into our desire and brought our ears close?

What if all the noise in our wombs hushed into silence, and we could truly hear the voice of our cervix speak?

A wise elder Grandmother of mine teaches that if a woman wants to know the innate power of her womb, to embark on a journey of celibacy for one year.

So I did three, and this is what I’ve learned:

Celibacy is a teacher of true feminine magnetism because it calls us back to our center, the cervix.

The voice you have always heard in your head? It’s her.

That intuitive ping you have always felt in your womb? It is her.

The wisdom that flows through you when you bleed? It’s your cervix.

We have been trained since a very young age to use our wombs as a graveyard for the ghosts of our shame, grief, resentment, hate and trauma.

Overtime, the culmination of these frequencies take up space within the womb. Energetically this shows up as black, thick, sticky sludge that blocks out the guiding light of our wombs.

It’s called shadow work for a reason, the energies we come to face are indeed dark.

The reason you can’t hear your cervix is because you’ve buried her underneath the grievances of your past.

Celibacy is a call to come back home to your womb, to cleanse her of all you are no longer needing to carry, and to reclaim the immense power of your wombspace once more.

Celibacy is an opportunity to create a closed container for yourself. When we set a container with intention, our womb will start to mirror the work that is required of us.

Excavating the shadows and healing womb trauma is a tender and vulnerable space; it asks of us presence, patience, curiosity and trust.

As we begin to work with our wombs, she will guide us towards what is needed. Foster a deeper relationship with her by massaging her slowly and mindfully with cold-pressed castor oil and the intention to listen, not climax.

Let her guide your fingers over every piece of scar tissue, to connect with every cyst, to linger with love wherever you feel numb.

Honour her by incorporating a dis-armouring practice with a pleasure wand, helping to create a new relationship with your cervix while softening and opening your heart.

With time, we create new meaning - we learn to meet our desires in a new way, our true feminine essence can flow freely, no longer fragmented by the past. We become whole, we remember that our spaciousness is ours, and that within it lies our power.

True feminine magnetism is learning to navigate and locate our most powerful desires. Once we have located our desire, we can begin to work with the energetic magnetic field of the cervix.

The toroidal field of the cervix has two forces - the centripetal force, which pulls the sperm to the egg, and the centrifugal force, which pushes the baby out.

Both of these forces are available to us at all times.

Now, think of it this way - cervix is the spider that sits in the center of the web; she magnetizes the satiation of her desires towards her. She sits still in her web, not moving towards or away from anything. She surrenders and trusts that her magnetism will pull what she needs to her and nourish her well.

The centrifugal force pulses the frequency of her desires out into the world around her, and the centripetal force responds and returns to her with a solution. This is true feminine magnetism, and it is an ancient technology.

Celibacy may seem like a daunting initiation, but it’s truly so much more than just unplugging from sex - it’s plugging into pleasure in a whole new way.

When you take away the possibility of having a lover, you gain the responsibility of becoming your own.

When we realize that we are the only ones who can make ourselves happy, we begin to create it.

We stop outsourcing our power, and start to remember how to truly tend our hearts and wombs.

We can move through life gracefully and with ease, because we can hear the voice of our cervix guiding us towards the life of our wildest dreams. We know our desires intimately, because we have created the space for them to exist within our wombs.

We unlock new ways of being in the world - expanded, connected, renewed.

And when we move in the world from our true feminine magnetism, all the things we were taught we had to hustle for begin to reveal themselves without much straining or effort.

If you have lost touch with your feminine essence, or feel disconnected from your womb, know that it is okay and there is nothing wrong with you or your beautiful body. We are cyclical beings and will walk many layers of the spiral on our own unique healing journey.

But feel, just for a moment, what would be possible if you gave yourself the space?

The space to explore, to uncover, to let go; what would be waiting for you on the other side?

Let your curiosity invite you - what would it feel like to go a week, a month, a year without sex?

When we say yes to change and yes to transformation, we say yes to growth on a whole new level.

Women, your womb is the place of your power - reclaim it, remember it, and allow her to show you who you came here to be.

Written by Autumn Rose

Autumn Rose is a mother, writer, storyteller & women’s embodiment guide devoted to empowering the feminine frequency and midwifing her back to her rightful home - in the body. Follow Autumn on Instagram @embodyjaguar.