No pattern changes by you demanding that it change. ⁠ ⁠

It changes when something in you feels safe enough to no longer need the pattern. ⁠ ⁠

So it is not condemnation that creates change, but rather understanding/recognition. ⁠ ⁠

Seeing that something exists. Feeling it’s texture. ⁠ ⁠ Feeling it’s validity & necessity.

That it is there because at some point is served a very real purpose for you. ⁠ ⁠

When I have compassion for myself, I feel safe. ⁠ ⁠

When I feel safe, I stop pushing/forcing.

I stop resisting. ⁠ ⁠

This leads me to self-acceptance and from there the change happens without me trying because I no longer demand it. ⁠