Integrating My Desire to be Objectified & Degraded (Eros Work)

Eros is anything we feel heat/arousal towards. It can also be anything we feel particularly averse to.⁠

High attraction OR high repulsion is an indication of something in our subconscious that is wanting to integrate.⁠

While many people play in the realm of eros through BDSM, kink, etc. when you are not bringing enough *conscious presence* into what you are doing, you can enter into a loop where you need to seek more & more intensity to get the same satisfaction.⁠

The key is to slow down and provide enough space to feel alllll of the subtlety that arises.⁠

Because when you’re pursuing eros, you may first feel arousal but inevitably you will also feel shame, guilt, repulsion, etc. along the way.⁠

If you bypass these things and attach purely to the arousal piece, the eros doesn’t have the opportunity to integrate.⁠

I used to have high eros around being objectified, I craved the feeling and would unconsciously seek & create situations in which I could be objectified & degraded sexually.⁠

When I explored this with my teacher over the past year, we slowed things waaaaay down where I had to feel the disgust & shame that arose *along with* the arousal & pleasure.⁠

My eros around being degraded & objectified has since become much more mild - there’s way less heat around it for me now (although not 100% integrated… there’s more fun to be had 😇)⁠

Eros work also does not just apply to the realm of sexuality. Again it is anything that carries an energy of attraction or repulsion for you. (You can have eros within your business!)⁠

The key is to bring awareness & embodiment to what you’re doing. Meaning go slowly enough to be PRESENT to what arises, and be willing to FEEL it all.⁠

We also don’t always need to experience the most INTENSE version of our eros in order for it to integrate… often seeking intensity can be a way to bypass the subtlety & uncomfortable feelings along the way.⁠