Nervous System Healing: A Guide to Restoring Safety in the Body

Our nervous system plays a powerful role in how we live and feel. It it determines how much joy and pleasure we can actually experience. When it’s overwhelmed, the body can’t relax, and we stop feeling much of anything at all.

Some things wear the nervous system down, others soothe it.

I believe creating a life filled with practices that soothe the nervous system is essential to living a happy, grounded life. When the body feels safe, we laugh more easily and we want to be touched. We also begin to feel alive in ordinary moments again.

Understanding The Nervous System

The nervous syste constantly scans for signals of safety and danger, deciding how we move, think, and feel. Every emotional wave passes through it and leaves an imprint that changes how the nervous system functions.

At the core of this system is the Central Nervous System (CNS), the brain and spinal cord. This is the command center where thoughts form, memories are stored, and decisions are made. It determines whether something feels safe or threatening and sends signals that shape your entire experience. When your brain perceives safety, it allows openness which lets your muscles loosen and your breath deepen. Through this your body becomes available for pleasure and rest.

Surrounding and supporting the CNS is the Peripheral Nervous System (PNS), a vast network of nerves that carries messages between the brain and every cell of the body. It governs both conscious and unconscious actions. The part you control, like moving your hand or taking a deep breath, is called the somatic system. The part you don’t control, like your heart rate, digestion, or arousal, is the autonomic system.

The autonomic system has two distinct branches that work together like tides. The sympathetic system speeds things up. It’s what jolts you awake when you hear a sudden noise or helps you focus during a deadline. But when active for too long, it keeps the body in survival mode. The parasympathetic system does the opposite and slows the heartbeat, deepens breathing, and encourages digestion, rest, and recovery. It’s where pleasure lives. The shift between these two states is what determines whether your body feels safe or guarded.

At the center of this regulation is the vagus nerve, the longest cranial nerve in the body. It travels from the brainstem through the face, heart, lungs, and gut, carrying messages of safety and connection, and the vagus nerve responds beautifully to certain sensory experiences.

What is a Dysregulated Nervous System?

A dysregulated nervous system is one that has lost its natural rhythm with the ability to rise in alertness and then return to calm. It’s like an accelerator stuck to the floor or a brake that never releases. When this happens, the body forgets how to rest.

Most people think stress lives only in the mind, but it’s the body that carries it. The nervous system learns from experience, and when those experiences are painful the system starts to anticipate danger everywhere. It becomes hypersensitive and slow to trust safety.

What Are The Symptoms of a Dysregulated Nervous System?

• Emotional reactivity, irritability, or panic.

• Inability to relax or feel at ease.

• Disconnection from joy or sensuality.

• Low libido or numbed pleasure response.

• Poor digestion or gut issues.

• Sleep disturbances or nightmares.

• Hyper-fixation on tasks or inability to focus.

• Feelings of emptiness, disassociation, or being outside one’s body.

How to Regulate Your Nervous System

Mindfulness

Mindfulness is one of the most powerful ways to communicate safety to the nervous system. When you bring your attention fully to the present moment, like feeling water on your hands or the ground beneath your feet, you shift the body out of projection and into perception. The brain stops scanning for danger because it’s anchored in what’s real right now.

From a physiological perspective, mindfulness strengthens the prefrontal cortex (responsible for regulation and emotional control) while quieting the amygdala (the brain’s alarm system). Over time, this rewiring increases your ability to notice when you’re dysregulated and bring yourself back before the spiral deepens.

Deep Breathing

Breath is the body’s built-in regulator, a direct line to the vagus nerve, which governs the parasympathetic (rest and digest) system. When you extend your exhale, you activate this nerve and send a biochemical signal to your organs that the threat has passed.

When your body has been living in survival mode, the breath becomes shallow and tight, especially in the upper chest. Training yourself to breathe low and slow reestablishes safety. Try inhaling until the belly and ribs expand, then exhaling longer than the inhale. Over time, this retrains your diaphragm to move fully, increasing oxygenation and restoring balance to the nervous system.

Yoni Egg Practice

The pelvis is the body’s center of gravity and its emotional anchor. It’s also one of the first places to contract when the nervous system senses threat.

When inserted, the smooth weight of the a crystal egg gently stimulates the vaginal walls, increasing blood flow and reawakening nerve pathways. This sensory feedback rebuilds proprioception, the awareness of where your body is in space.

Physiologically, this practice enhances vagal tone through its connection to the pelvic branch of the vagus nerve. The slow breathing and gentle muscle engagement required to hold the egg stimulate this nerve, and over time, women often notice not only improved pelvic health but a deeper sense of being rooted, calm, and embodied.

Somatic Movement

Somatic movement is a practice that focuses on the felt sense of movement and the internal, physical sensations rather than the external appearance. It’s about moving from the inside out, with awareness and presence. When you bring attention to how movement feels, you begin to restore communication between the central nervous system (CNS) and the body, allowing patterns of tension and holding to finally unwind.

This form of movement is slow and deeply intentional. You’re listening to its impulses and letting sensation guide you. As you do, the brain and spinal cord receive new sensory input that helps repattern the body’s responses to stress. Practices like yoga, tai chi, and qigong are naturally somatic because they bring awareness to breath, posture, and sensation. But even simple gestures like stretching in bed, rolling the shoulders, walking slowly, or paying deep attention during self pleasure can become somatic when done with conscious attention.

Havening Techniques

Havening uses gentle, repetitive touch to rewire emotional states through sensory input. When you stroke the skin of your arms, face, or hands in slow, rhythmic motions, especially when paired with calm breathing, your brain releases delta waves, the same pattern it produces during deep sleep and repair.

It’s remarkably simple. You can lightly stroke your upper arms from shoulders to elbows, trace your fingers down your cheeks, or rub your palms together while breathing slowly. Combine this touch with steady, neutral phrases like “I’m safe now,” “It’s okay to rest,” or even a pleasant image that soothes your mind.

Crystal Wands

Most women don’t realize how disconnected they’ve become from their pleasure, and from calm within pleasure. We’re often taught that pleasure should build quickly and end in release. That pattern keeps the body in a subtle state of tension, where the nervous system is bracing rather than relaxing. Even in self-pleasure, many women unconsciously replicate the same fight-or-flight pattern that rules the rest of their lives, speeding up and leaving the body behind.

Crystal wands help reverse that. During use, each breath and movement becomes an exploration of how the body actually feels, instead of what it “should” be feeling. This mindful, unhurried approach sends a signal to the autonomic nervous system that the body is safe. The parasympathetic system (the body’s rest-and-digest mode) activates, softening the muscles of the pelvis and slowing the heartbeat. What was once a place of effort begins to feel like a place of presence.

When you move with a crystal wand in this way, you’re retraining your nervous system to associate arousal with calm instead of urgency. The vagus nerve, which connects the pelvis to the heart and brain, begins to regulate more smoothly.

Digital Detox

Our nervous system wasn’t designed to process constant stimulation. Every notification, flashing light, and scroll of information keeps the brain in a low-grade state of alert. Even when we think we’re relaxing, our sensory pathways are overloaded. This overexposure prevents the parasympathetic system from doing its job.

When you step away from technology, the body finally stops scanning and the mind’s pace slows to something the body can match. Replacing digital stimulation with grounding rituals helps anchor you back into your senses and this is when the nervous system starts to recover.

Cold Water Exposure (or Temperature Play)

Temperature is one of the most direct ways to influence the nervous system. The vagus nerve, which runs from the brainstem through the face, heart, and gut, responds strongly to shifts in temperature, especially cold. A brief cold shower or a cool compress on the chest, or even some temperature play with a crystal wand sends a signal to the brain that helps reset the vagal response, pulling the body out of panic or hyperarousal.

Cold exposure increases vagal tone and strengthens resilience. The first seconds trigger the sympathetic response but as you stay with it, the parasympathetic system activates to balance the shock.

Touch Mapping and Boundary Practice

When the body has experienced unwanted touch or has been denied touch altogether, the boundaries between comfort and discomfort blur. Begin by exploring your body with different sensations, your fingertips, a feather, a cloth, or even your breath and notice where your body softens and where it resists. You might find areas that feel neutral, others that crave contact, and some that say no.

As you move, name what you feel: “Yes, I like this,” “No, that feels too much,” or “I’m not sure yet.” Speaking your boundaries aloud strengthens the link between the sensory and cognitive parts of your brain, building trust in your own perception. This practice is especially powerful for those who’ve learned to override their needs or freeze during discomfort.

Sounding

Sound is one of the body’s oldest ways to regulate the nervous system. When you let sound move through you you’re physically stimulating the vagus nerve, which runs through the throat, chest, and diaphragm. Each vibration of your voice sends a ripple of safety down the body, reminding it that breath is flowing and you’re alive.

In moments of stress, fear, or overthinking, the throat tightens and breath becomes shallow. Vocalization deepens breathing and helps release the emotions that have been trapped in silence. The vagus nerve links the throat and pelvis, so when one softens, the other follows, this is why allowing sound during sex or emotional release often brings profound relaxation to the whole body.

Weighted Pressure and Containment

Weighted pressure is one of the simplest and most effective ways to calm a hyperactive nervous system. The body interprets firm, even weight as a signal of safety, similar to the grounding touch a caregiver gives a child. Using a Free Bleed® blanket or a weighted cover during rest can create that same physiological reassurance.

This technique is particularly helpful when you feel overstimulated, anxious, or emotionally exposed. After sex, during menstruation, or following an emotional trigger, the body can hold a subtle tremor of activation. Applying steady weight communicates containment. Pairing pressure with stillness or soft, rhythmic music deepens the down-regulation response. It creates a cocoon for the body to integrate sensation instead of pushing it away.

Smell-Based Grounding

Scent is the most direct sensory pathway to the limbic system, the part of the brain that governs emotion, memory, and autonomic regulation. One breath of a familiar or comforting aroma can shift the entire state of your body faster than thought ever could. Smell-based grounding uses this pathway to stabilize the nervous system when it feels scattered, anxious, or detached.

Choose earthy, calming scents like vetiver, sandalwood, or patchouli when you need grounding; floral oils such as rose or ylang-ylang when you want softness and emotional comfort. Inhale slowly through the nose, allowing the scent to travel deep into your chest, and exhale through the mouth as if melting. Repeat several times until your breath naturally lengthens and the mind starts to quiet.

Orienting to Safety

Orienting is a simple practice drawn from trauma recovery that teaches the brain to recognize the present moment as safe. When the nervous system is overwhelmed, the eyes tend to fixate or narrow. Orientation breaks that freeze pattern by gently moving the eyes and head, reminding the brain thatwe are here, now, and not in danger.

Start by taking a slow breath and letting your eyes wander around the space you’re in. Move your head and neck gently, look to the right, to the left, up, and down. As you do, name what you see, a chair, a window, sunlight, my hands. Notice any colors, textures, or shapes that feel neutral or pleasant. This is about giving your brain real-time evidence of safety.

As you orient, you may notice subtle shifts as your nervous system updating its information. Orientation works because vision and balance are deeply tied to the vagus nerve and midbrain, which regulate alertness and calm. When your eyes move, your body receives the message that scanning is complete and there’s no threat to track.

Reconnect to Safety and Sensation with Viva La Vagina™

Viva La Vagina 2.0™ is an online membership for women grounded in the science and art of somatic sex education. It’s designed for women who are ready to reconnect with their bodies through practices that are gentle and deeply supportive of nervous system repair.

At the core of this work is one essential truth that the nervous system must feel safe before pleasure, arousal, or sensation can return. When the body has lived in survival mode it can’t simply relax into pleasure. It needs guidance and slow, body-based experiences that rebuild trust from the inside out.

Viva La Vagina™ offers a library of structured, progressive practices. Each session works with the body’s natural mechanisms of regulation and repair. Members learn how to:

• Activate vagal tone through sound, breath, and rhythm, strengthening the body’s ability to return to calm.

• Regulate fight, flight, and freeze responses by giving the body safe, sensory anchors that restore flexibility between states.

• Reconnect to pelvic awareness, voice, and boundaries, restoring the felt sense of “this is my body, and it belongs to me.”

• Explore sexual healing tools, such as yoni eggs and crystal wands as ways to awaken sensation and re-pattern safety through pleasure.

Learn More

FAQ

• How to resolve a dysregulated nervous system?

  To resolve a dysregulated nervous system, you must teach the body how to return to safety after chronic activation. The autonomic nervous system (ANS), which includes the sympathetic (fight-or-flight) and parasympathetic (rest-and-digest) branches loses flexibility when exposed to chronic stress, trauma, or emotional overwhelm. Healing begins by helping both systems communicate again.

  
  

  Start by engaging the parasympathetic nervous system through slow, deep breathing exercises, rhythmic movement, and grounding techniques that anchor you in the present moment. Practices like somatic experiencing, mindfulness, or gentle physical touch can help process traumatic memories stored in the body and restore emotional regulation.

  
  

  Other forms of nervous system healing include improving sleep quality, maintaining a healthy weight, and ensuring adequate nutrients that support nerve repair. Gentle physical exercise, exposure to nature, and supportive relationships all promote safety and stability within the central nervous system (CNS) and peripheral nervous system (PNS).

• How long does it take for the nervous system to heal?

  The healing process depends on how long the body has lived in stress responses. A few weeks of consistent nervous system regulation practices can begin to lower blood pressure, improve sleep, and reduce muscle tension, but full nervous system recovery often takes months to years of repetition.

  
  

  The nervous system is a complex network of nerve cells that adapts through neuroplasticity, the brain’s ability to form new pathways when given repeated, safe experiences. By practicing deep breathing, grounding techniques, and body awareness daily, you gradually strengthen the ventral vagal system (the branch of the vagus nerve responsible for social engagement and calm).

• What are the symptoms of a dysregulated nervous system?

  A dysregulated nervous system affects both physical health and mental health because the autonomic nervous system controls involuntary functions like heart rate, digestion, and hormonal release. Symptoms can appear as emotional dysregulation, chronic pain, fatigue, or anxiety.

  
  

  Common physical symptoms include digestive issues, shallow breathing, rapid heartbeat, dizziness, and tension in the shoulders, jaw, or pelvis. Emotionally, you might experience irritability, numbness, overreaction, or emotional shutdown. Sleep disturbances, poor focus, and reduced libido are also indicators that the nervous system feels unsafe. These signs occur because the sympathetic nervous system stays active for too long, while the parasympathetic system struggles to restore balance.

• How do I heal the nervous system?

  To heal your nervous system, focus on restoring balance across the central and peripheral systems through both daily practice and trauma-informed care. Start by activating the relaxation response: slow deep breathing, grounding in physical sensations, and gentle somatic experiencing that helps your body process past trauma and traumatic events without overwhelm.

  
  

  Prioritize adequate sleep, regular meals with essential nutrients, and stress reduction through physical exercise that feels supportive, like walking or yoga. Engage in body-based tools such as vocalization, self-touch, or temperature play to stimulate the vagus nerve and encourage the parasympathetic nervous system to reengage. These sensory practices help the body responds to stress in healthier ways, improving emotional resilience and overall well-being.

Meet Your Author

Danelle Ferreira

Danelle Ferreira is a content marketing expert who writes for women-owned businesses, creating heart-centered content that helps brands grow and messages spread with purpose. Her passion is helping women-led brands craft stories that move people. Her journey into content creation began seven years ago when she launched Ellastrology, an astrology YouTube channel that explored astrological wisdom and human connection. But it wasn’t long before she realized her true calling was in writing, the kind that makes people feel seen, heard, and understood. Now, as a mom, a writer, and an advocate for deeper conversations, she spends her days crafting content that empowers women while staying rooted in authenticity, all from her home in South Africa, surrounded by her loving son, two noisy parrots, and two sweet dogs.

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