Why We Settle for Co-Dependency

We settle for co-dependency and partners that don't meet us deeply because it's easier than feeling the excruciating pain of NOT being met.⁠

In other words, when we CAN'T tolerate our own feminine longing to be met deeply, we settle for relating that half-meets us.⁠

As I've explored my longing for partnership over the past many months, this has involved feeling a LOT of grief.⁠

As I recognize the depth of what I desire, I feel pain around not having had it.⁠

And yet as I MEET my own pain, my capacity grows.⁠

My standards raise effortlessly.⁠

And there becomes less & less need to settle.⁠

It becomes MORE painful to settle than to be with my longing.⁠

If you cannot be with your longing, if you cannot tolerate it --> you will unconsciously find partners who also cannot meet you.⁠

Because they are reflecting your own lack of capacity to meet yourself.⁠